How long a date actually takes
Dinner, drinks and dessert is 3 hr 40 min of sitting down, before you have walked anywhere. Most people plan a three-stop night as though it were two hours and then wonder why the last place is closing. These are the numbers our planner uses, and they are the reason it will not hand you a night that does not fit.
How long you actually spend in each kind of place
These are not guesses about how long a thing should take. They are the dwell times the planner schedules with, and getting them wrong is what produces a plan nobody can actually follow.
| Shape of night | Stops | Sitting down |
|---|---|---|
| Dinner, then drinksDinner 95m · Drinks 90m | 2 | 3 hr 5 min |
| Drinks, then dinnerFirst drink 55m · Dinner 95m | 2 | 2 hr 30 min |
| The full nightDinner 95m · Drinks 85m · Dessert 40m | 3 | 3 hr 40 min |
| Do something, then eatThe thing 80m · Food after 75m | 2 | 2 hr 35 min |
| DaytimeCoffee 45m · A walk 60m · Something to eat 50m | 3 | 2 hr 35 min |
| Something to talk aboutThe thing 90m · Dinner 95m | 2 | 3 hr 5 min |
| Big night outDinner 90m · Bar 80m · Out out 120m | 3 | 4 hr 50 min |
| Explore the cityArts & culture 90m · Food 90m · Games & activities 80m · Dessert 40m | 4 | 5 hr |
| Make a day of itCoffee 45m · Arts & culture 90m · Food 90m · Time outdoors 60m · Dessert 40m | 5 | 5 hr 25 min |
If you build your own stop list
The presets above carry their own times, tuned to the shape of that particular night. Choosing your own stops instead uses the per-stop defaults, which are close but not identical: food 90m, drinks 75m, dessert 40m, games & activities 80m, time outdoors 60m, coffee 45m, arts & culture 90m, nightlife 100m.
Why the number is bigger than you expected
Three things get left out when people plan in their head. A sit-down dinner is closer to an hour and a half than an hour once you count being seated, ordering, and waiting for the check — which is the part nobody budgets for. Travel between stops is not free, even on foot. And the last stop has to still be open when you arrive, which is a different question from whether it is open when you set out.
Put together: a full night starting at seven is not finishing at ten. It is finishing closer to eleven, and the dessert place needs to be open then.
What to do with that
- Two stops is a complete night. Three is a long one. If you are nervous about running out of things to say, two good stops beats three rushed ones.
- Work backwards from the last closing time, not forwards from when you leave. The dessert place closing at ten is the real constraint on a seven o’clock dinner.
- Leave the third stop optional. A night that can end after two and continue if it is going well is better than one that has to be completed.